but i thought i would respost it because it still rings quite true:
i feel like the things i enjoy contridict themselves.
like, i just LOVE Jesus.
He is my favorite,
but i like rap music,
and some rated R movies.
I like going to Montrose
and meeting allll kinds of characters there.
some people I meet
are homosexuals
and thieves.
I like dumb shows on mtv.
Sometimes I cuss.
now, I dont like that,
but sometimes I do.
I'm a girl full of contradictions.
I dont know if thats a good or bad thing.
So until I figure that out,
it just is what it is.
i want to go to boston.
really bad.
i think id like it there.
people say the east coast is too busy,
but i think id enjoy it.
the open road excites me.
i want to go on a road trip and not plan anything.
i just want to drive across the country
and see what happens.
scratch that,
i want to backpack across
europe and stay in hostels.
and meet new people.
and speak the French that I have learned.
and make money with my pictures.
or my art.
and draw everything all the time.
like hands.
i love drawing hands.
and trees.
and that catholic church on main street.
i like to draw people who
have curls in their hair.
and people who wear flowy clothes.
scarves and skirts and such.
if i could live any way i wanted,
i would just travel.
and take pictures.
and praise God every day.
i would be a missionary part of the time.
i know that selfish that i say part of the time,
but like i said, i contradict some things.
i would try to find a cure for cancer.
and go talk with people in Calcutta, India who have aids.
i would share the gospel to them.
Like Mother Theresa.
i would buy clothes from different cultures.
and wear them.
i would go to so many more concerts.
i would want every day to be around 70 degrees,
and overcast.
and i would always roll the windows down.
i would never run out of gas.
I would visit the beach a lot more.
Become better friends with the sun.
And the waves.
i would jump on a lot more trampolines.
and sing a lot more karaoke.
and play a lot more sports.
and eat more chips and salsa.
and learn the waltz.
and the tango.
and buy a sail boat.
and listen to Matt Wertz all the time.
with a little bit of playradioplay,
and postal. of course.
i would buy a guitar and teach myself.
or better yet, a ukulele!
that way i could make my own music.
not that i dont love the music on my ipod,
cuz i do.
but if i created my own music,
it would be the way I wanted it.
it would be as long as i wanted
or as short as i wanted.
it would be the chords i chose
specifically for the certain words i would sing.
it would have this melody, or that.
and there would always be room for harmony.
i would sing duets with my dad
and have my brother play the piano.
but most importantly,
it would be my own.
and i would feel like i created something in this world.
that i left something to be remembered.
something that was worth remembering.
i want to leave a mark.
so that the world is somehow changed when i leave it.
i want to have some sort of influence.
i would buy a puppy.
and write my novel.
i have so many ideas.
i have so much to say.
i would forgive everyone who has hurt me.
and help others with their hurt.
and fish.
i wouldnt be so directionally challenged.
i would get over my fear of heights.
and just jump out of the plane already.
i wouldnt over think things anymore.
and sing so much more.
i kind of want to hold all of my conversations in song.
like living in a musical.
and not think about yesterday, unless it was necessary.
but if i lived the way i wanted, it would never be necessary.
but i might just want to.
and getting lost would always be an adventure.
mainly because i get lost everywhere.
i would devote every day to learning new ways to love God and love people.
i want to experience everything beautiful.
ever heard of a dreamer?
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